Songs of the Spark
by PrimeEmily135
Summary: Sparkbreak is a hard thing to cope with, especially for our favorite Autobot leader. And Arcee has a hard time coping with the fact that he won't accept that she really does love him. Complete!
1. Give your Spark a Break

**My first attempt to a songfic, I know not very many people like them but I thought I'd give it a shot. :)**

**I do not own Transformers Prime or the Lyrics to "give your heart a break".**

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_The day I first met you_

_You told me you'd never fall in love_

_But now that I get you_

_I know fear is what it really was..._

Arcee had tried many times to convince him that he needn't be afraid of a relationship. But each and every time had ended with failure. This last time had taken a turn for the worst though, and he had finally told her why he was so hesitant to try to love her like she claimed to love him.

Apparently, before the war Optimus had been in a very good relationship with a femme called Eleita. When he was named Prime she had left him for the Decepticons. He never knew why, and it had broken his spark beyond repair. He had given his spark to that femme, and she took it in her servos and crushed it!

He had told her that if he could love her, he would. But his spark hurt to much to even think about another possibly disastrous relationship. He knew she cared but it seemed he didn't trust himself to make the right choice.

_Now here we are_

_So close yet so far_

_Haven't I passed the test_

_When will you realize_

_Baby, I'm not like the rest..._

She lay on her berth, staring at the ceiling. Trying to think of some way to convince him that she would never hurt him. She didn't think her spark could take it if she hurt him like that.

_Don't wanna break your heart_

_Wanna give your heart a break_

_I know you're scared it's wrong_

_Like you might make a mistake_

_There's just one life to live_

_And there's no time to wait, to waste_

_So let me give your heart a break, give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break, your heart a break_

_Oh yeah, yeah..._

She stood up, wiping the tears from her eyes. After he had explained everything to her he had just left her alone. He just turned around and left. No one knew where he was and he wouldn't answer his com.

_On Sunday you went home alone_

_There were tears in your eyes_

_I called your cell phone, my love_

_But you did not reply..._

She wished she could show him what they could do together. How happy they could be if only he'd let go if his fear. If only he'd trust her.

_The world is ours if we want it_

_We can take it if you just take my hand_

_There's no turning back now_

_Baby, try to understand..._

_Don't wanna break your heart_

_Wanna give your heart a break_

_I know you're scared it's wrong_

_Like you might make a mistake_

_There's just one life to live_

_And there's no time to wait, to waste_

_So let me give your heart a break, give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break, your heart a break..._

_There's just so much you can take_

_Give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break, your heart a break_

_Oh yeah, yeah_...

Arcee stood up and wandered from her room down the hall, pondering the few times be had shown any emotion to her. They all ended up the same way. He would run from her. And she could see the hurt in his optics every time.

_When your lips are on my lips_

_And our hearts beat as one_

_But you slip out of my fingertips_

_Every time you run, whoa-oh-whoa-oh-oh_...

She walked out into the open room where the rest of the team was. They were all so happy. It didn't seem fair that she was the only one miserable. She walked past them, ignoring their questions and simply going outside to look over the cliff edge at the desert.

_Don't wanna break your heart_

_Wanna give your heart a break_

_I know you're scared it's wrong_

_Like you might make a mistake_

_There's just one life to live_

_And there's no time to wait, to waste_

_So let me give your heart a break_

_(Let me give your heart a break_)...

She sat down tiredly, letting her feet dangle of the edge. He was driving her insane! Why couldn't he see that her feelings were true and not some temporary thing?

As her built up tears poured down her face, she heard the distant roar of a Semi speeding towards the base. She didn't care if Optimus was back. What difference did it make? He wouldn't let her help him. He was too closed off.

'_Cause you've been hurt before_

_I can see it in your eyes_

_You try to smile it away, some things you can't disguise_

_Don't wanna break your heart_

_Maybe, I can ease the ache, the ache_

_So let me give your heart a break, give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break, your heart a break..._

She heard the truck stop and the distant sound of transforming. When she peaked through her fingers she could see that he was watching her, a sad look in his optics. She tried to reach out to him, to contact him in a private com.

_There's just so much you can take_

_Give your heart a break_

_Let me give your heart a break (your heart), your heart a break (a break)_

_Oh yeah, yeah_...

But then he just turned his gaze away and left to go inside. Without saying a word.

_The day I first met you_

_You told me you'd never fall in love_...

He refused to...

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**This has to be the first story I wrote where they don't end up together! Please Review :)**


	2. Starts with Goodbye

**I do not own lyrics to "Starts with Goodbye". **

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Arcee couldn't walk the halls of their base anymore. She couldn't bear seeing him all the time, pretending that what was said never took place. Every time she looked at him, or him her, she felt like she was dying inside. So, she couldn't stay there anymore. She just couldn't.

She tentatively peaked around the corner into the main room, where her leader stood at the computer working. Taking a steadying breath, she gripped the data pad in her servos and strode out into the room. He didn't even look in her direction.

"Optimus?" she stood directly behind him, but he did little more than grunt in response. She shook her head, willing her tears to stay where they were. She had never wished more then now for the Prime's emotionless mask.

When she didn't continue, Optimus paused in his work, looking over his shoulder slightly. "What is it you need Arcee?"

She shook her head quickly, refusing to show her true feelings. "Nothing really, I just have something here I need you to read, but it can wait. I see you are busy with more important things..." she set the data pad down on one of the crates, feeling her spark break at the very motion.

Then she turned and started to walk out of the base.

_I was sitting on my doorstep,_

_I hung up the phone and it fell out of my hand,_

_But I knew I had to do it,_

_And he wouldn't understand,_

_So hard to see myself without him,_

_I felt a piece of my heart break,_

_But when you're standing at a crossroad,_

_There's a choice you gotta make..._

As soon as she was sure he wouldn't hear her anymore, she transformed and drove off. She didn't know where she would go, or how far she could get. But her mind was made. She wasn't ever going to go back.

_I guess it's gonna have to hurt,_

_I guess I'm gonna have to cry,_

_And let go of some things I've loved,_

_To get to the other side,_

_I guess it's gonna break me down,_

_Like falling when you try to fly,_

_It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,_

_Starts with goodbye.._.

After a moment, she forced herself to de-activate her com-link. She didn't want to hear them anymore. Mostly because Ratchet would try to convince her to come back. He had a strange way of doing that. But the only reason she had stayed for so long was a hope that someday Optimus would return her feelings. Now that that hope was gone, she doubted if even Ratchet's logic could convince her to go back.

She was hurting too much inside. She just had to get away. So with a mental adjustment, she off-lined her locating beacon as well.

She drove for hours in the dark, simply focusing on the dark horizon. She didn't care where she went, if she didn't still believe in the Autobot cause she would have probably gone straight to Megatron.

_I know there's a blue horizon,_

_Somewhere up ahead, just waiting for me,_

_Getting there means leaving things behind,_

_Sometimes life's so bitter sweet..._

Finally, after what seemed like an eternity she stopped at the side of the road and transformed. Quickly dodging into the woods so the humans wouldn't see her, she tried to hide away from the world.

She walked down the forest's natural paths to a place where a small cliff overlooked a large lake. There she sat down and buried her face in her servos to cry.

_I guess it's gonna have to hurt,_

_I guess I'm gonna have to cry,_

_And let go of some things I've loved,_

_To get to the other side,_

_I guess it's gonna break me down,_

_Like falling when you try to fly,_

_It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,_

_Starts with goodbye.._.

She vented, wiping the Energon away from her face. She couldn't afford to waste precious fuel on stupid things like crying. If she was truly done with the Autobots she would have to go the way of Starscream and find ways to fend for herself.

After a few minutes of silent reflection she looked up at the brightening sky. The sunlight shimmered on the lake, lighting up her otherwise dark world. And when the ball of flame came into the sky, she felt it warm her armor, comforting her. Sure, it would be tough to live without them. But she was a tough girl. After some time she was sure her hurt spark would heal. And maybe, perhaps she could move on and find someone else?

_Time heals,_

_The wounds that you feel,_

_Somehow, right now.._.

But, she knew she would never forget him. He would be ever present in her processor until she off-lined. She would always wonder what it would have been like if he had loved her too.

_I guess I'm gonna have to cry,_

_And let go of some things I've loved,_

_To get to the other side,_

_Starts with goodbye,_

_Like falling when you try to fly,_

_It's sad, but sometimes moving on with the rest of your life,_

_Starts with goodbye.._.

"Goodbye Optimus..." she whispered to herself. "I hope you find someone who makes you happy..."

She knew she never would.

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**To VecterPrime155: I am going to take some of your suggestions in mind as I write this. It was supposed to be a one-shot but you inspired a little plot bunny in my head that I can work with. Thanks!**

**Next chapter will be about Optimus. And it will be out as soon as I find a song that says; "I'm such an aft!" ;)**

**Please Review! :)**


	3. I Lost You

**I do not own the lyrics to "I Lost You**".

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He had waited for her footsteps to die away before he turned to take a look at the data pad she had left. But when he did, he wished he hadn't waited a second. As he read the note he felt his knees start to go weak and his venting labored. And when he finished it his servos shook violently, in shock.

"Arcee..." he dropped the data pad, his spark feeling hollow and desolate. He heard it crash to the floor, but he was too stunned to care. Arcee had left?

Optimus took a shaky intake and leaned against the wall to support himself. He had caused this. He had driven her away with his indifference and his refusal to show her how he really felt.

_I Lost You_

_I Lost You_

_You slipped from your costume_

_Like an actress in this tragedy_

_You're just an apparition in a haunting mystery_

_I fear that you've passed over me..._

_And there's nothing I can do because_

_I Lost You..._

"Arcee-" his voice cracked with sudden grief, and he collapsed to his knees. Tears ran down his face freely, like the title of Prime had vanished. The sadness of Orion had surfaced, and his broken spark had been brought back to the light to get another large crack in it. He bent forward with his face in his servos and he cried freely. "What have I done?!"

He had refused to love her to keep her safe from any unnecessary danger, yet he had pushed her to her limits and she had left because she felt unwanted, unneeded, and undesirable. She had felt cast aside by him, when he had ignored her feelings, and it had broke her spark to the point where she couldn't stand to be around him anymore. "Arcee, I'm so sorry!" he had broke her spark, the one thing he had sworn never to do to any femme. And he had lost her.

_Just like a rich man who is careless of his change_

_I took you for granted_

_And then you went to strangers_

_From deep within my heart I feel a distant fading pulse_

_A poor woman looking for last coin in her purse..._

He tried in vain to contact her, but he was met with static. She had informed him that she would erase any trace of her being from them and that they would never be able to find her again. She was obviously very serious about it.

He heard the distant roar of engines about to enter the base but he couldn't pull himself together. He felt a burning hole in his spark where he had let a little fire start kindling with feelings for Arcee. And it was burning him from the inside out! His Energon was on fire in his veins and his frame shook uncontrollably. He knelt on the floor, shivering and shaking in shock. "Arcee..." he whimpered her name, unable to do anything as his fellow Autobots entered the base.

_I Lost You_

_I Lost You_

_You slipped from your costume_

_Like an actress in this tragedy_

_You're just an apparition in a haunting mystery_

_I fear that you've passed over me..._

_And there's nothing I can do because_

_I Lost You_...

He wished he could hide from the others, but he couldn't even collect himself enough to stand. When Bumblebee came into the room he beeped in alarm and rushed to his leader's side. The young bot had never seen Optimus cry, and this level of distress scared him. He whirled for Ratchet, calling the medic with much urgency. But he didn't pay attention to any of it. All he could see was the image of Arcee on the cliff with tears in her optics. He should have gone to her! He should have comforted her! He should have told her the truth! But he had just turned his back on her.

_Just like a counterfeit you pass from palm to palm_

_I chased the one I surely loved to someone else's arms_

_I mislaid my senses, now that's easy to say_

_A fool who took his pleasure but then threw his love away_...

He was faintly aware of Ratchet ushering the children and the others away into the other room, for which he was immensely grateful. He tried to regain control of his breathing, slowing them to grasp control of his cries. When Ratchet returned he was glad to have reduced his sobs to weak, choppy vents and silent tears. The medic, his friend, knelt down next to him and put a comforting hand in his shoulder.

"Optimus, it's okay... Just let it out. What's wrong?" Ratchet had personally never seen him break down to this extent but he wasn't surprised. Orion was still very young, the war was very wearing on him, slowly tearing him apart.

He couldn't even look up at his friend. His spark seemed to be dying in his chest! He hadn't felt this way since... "Ratchet, I did it again..." he whispered hoarsely. "I've chased the one person I care about the most away from me! Arcee's gone..."

_I Lost You_

_I Lost You_

_You slipped from your costume_

_Like an actress in this tragedy_

_You're just an apparition in a haunting mystery_

_I fear that you've passed over me..._

_And there's nothing I can do because_

_I Lost You..._

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S**o there you go. Hope you like. Please review. BTW, who saw the season finale and cried? Please tell me I wasn't the only one. I really hope that its just some cliffhanger and that he's okay... I don't know how he could survive, but I can still hope right?**


	4. Alone but not Lonely

**I do not own the lyrics to "Alone but not Lonely"**

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Arcee looked up at the stars tiredly, nestling down between to boulders to protect herself from the violent winds. Three weeks she had been wandering around, alone.

She had spent the time well though, tracking Airachnid through the cold northern lands of America. But she was starting to feel worse for the weather. She was slowing down, feeling weaker, and growing lonely. She found with every waking moment, when she wasn't tracking Airachnid over a cliff, she thought about the team and their human friends. Bumblebee... Ratchet... Jack... And everyone else...

_I haven't a reason, a clue or a sign_

_I haven't the slightest idea_

_Of the shape of your heart or the state of your mind_

_Do you ever let anyone near_

_Do you ever reach out with arms open wide_

_Do you ever jump in closing your eyes_

_Or are you one of the fortunate kind_

_Alone but not lonely..._

She shivered fitfully and wrapped her arms tighter around her frame. She off-lined her optics slowly, letting the cold night consume her as she tried to slip into recharge.

But she couldn't fall asleep. Every time she tried she couldn't stop thinking about Optimus Prime. Just his name made her spark soar! She tried to get over him and forget him, but she just couldn't...

She vented and looked around her again. It was supposed to be dark out, but the snow made everything brighter. It sparkled like his optics...

"Oh Primus..." she shook her helm in disgust at herself. She just couldn't stop thinking about him! His beautiful optics. Those thick, strong arms. His prominent hips and long legs... And that voice-Oh, that deep, sexy voice! It all made her knees weak... All that, and not to mention his perfect character. Caring. Vigilant. Strong.

She missed him. And even when she tried to forget him, she wanted him. She wanted him to be lonely without her like she was with him, but she would never know if he was.

"By the Alspark, I miss him..." she covered her face with her servos, willing her tears to stay where they belonged.

_Everyday on the street I study their faces_

_The ones who rush on through the crowd_

_Towards their own quiet worlds, their separate places_

_Somewhere I'm never allowed_

_'Cause I've always been one to say what I need_

_And than the next thing it's done and I'm watching 'em leave_

_And I'm thinking, I wish I could be_

_Alone but not lonely.._.

Throughout the night she watched the wind blow snow across the forest floor. It helped to calm her mind but the desolate surroundings only made her feelings of worthlessness increase. She felt like no one cared that she was gone, that no one would ever come looking for her.

"He's probably glad I'm gone." she reasoned with herself. "He doesn't have to deal with me and my stupid mouth anymore... I bet he's happy about that."

How many times had she upset him? How many times had she disobeyed him and made him worry? When did she ever please him? She never knew what he felt, he always hid his emotions. But she was sure about one thing. There was no way he could ever miss her.

_So which one are you tonight_

_Do you change with the morning light_

_Do you say more than what sounds right_

_Do you say what you mean?..._

Arcee stood as the sun peaked through the barren tree branches, falling on her half frozen form. She had a job to complete, and she would fulfill it even if it killed her. In a way, she supposed that was what she was going for. Finding Airachnid was a suicide mission. But she was willing to do anything to relieve her spark of pain. At least this way she could avenge her lost comrade in the process.

_There are moments in time that are meant to be held_

_Like fragile, breakable things_

_There are others that pass us, you can't even tell_

_Such is their grace and their speed_

_And this one is gone in the blink of an eye_

_You can ask me the truth but tonight I will lie_

_Unflinching I'll tell you that I'm alone but not lonely_...

She wanted to contact them so badly. She just wanted to hear their voices. She wanted to know that they missed her... But she clenched her fists tightly and bit down on her lip. She was stronger then that. She wouldn't go back, ever. She wouldn't speak to them again, never again.

_You can ask me the truth but tonight I will lie_

_Unflinching I'll tell you that I'm alone but not lonely_...

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**:) please review :)**


	5. Want me Back

**I do not own the lyrics to "Want me back"**

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He had never thought that she would leave. He knew she would be upset, he thought she would get over it after a while, but never had he ever even considered that she would leave. He must have really hurt her for her to reach such an extreme...

_Said you wanted space_

_You wrote it in a letter_

_Left a bitter taste_

_For a while_

_How could you waste_

_All the love we made?_

_Throw it in my face_

_With a satisfying smile_...

Since she had gone he hadn't known what to do. He knew that the mission came first, and that he was never supposed to break character as a Prime, but he was falling apart inside. He couldn't focus, and he couldn't function properly as a leader.

Optimus sat on his berth, his head hidden behind his servos. A whole month. One, long, agonizing month she had been gone without a trace. And no matter how hard he tried, he couldn't find her. He had stayed up long nights at the computer watching the screen, praying to Primus for a sign, a hint, a clue, anything that could help him find her. But it had all resulted in nothing. He couldn't find her.

"Arcee, I'm sorry..." he whispered into the air, hearing the apology bounce off the bare walls meaninglessly. His sincere words meant nothing if he couldn't say them to her. But even if he had the chance, he doubted she would want him anymore.

Cos yeah I know we fought

_But still I thought_

_Once said words were over_

_And once over you forgot_

_It made us strong_

_What went wrong?..._

"I am such a jerk-aft..." and to make matters worse, his inability to perform his job as a leader had caused the others to pick up his slack. None of the younger bots knew exactly why their leader was becoming so secluded and unsure of himself. They all missed Arcee, but none of them seemed to have made the connection. Ratchet was the only one that knew, and when he wasn't complaining about the Prime's current emotional condition, he was the only one who truly understood. He had known Optimus back when he had been dating Elieta and had seen the torment he had put himself through when he had lost her.

Optimus stood up, fixing a stern look on his face. He couldn't let this be like the last time. He had to find Arcee.

His shoulders slumped again however as he walked outside into the chaos of the base. He couldn't afford to be like this, it was costing them all because of his mistake. He needed Arcee back, it was the only way to fix his dysfunctional processor and by doing that fix the Autobots.

But she had said she would never come back.

_I hope you change your mind_

_If you want me back_

_I'm sleeping in the same sheets_

_Haven't changed a thing_

_Since you left me alone_

_Do you want me back?_

_Cos I can't stand the suspense_

_At my heart's expense..._

He glared at the three Autobots all in an argument and coughed to announce his presence in the room. They all froze upon seeing that he had emerged from his room again. Bumblebee was the first to break from the argument. The young scout ran to him, flinging his arms around him with tears streaking down his face.

[Tell me it's not true!] he beeped, hiding his scared face against the Prime's chest. [You can't be going insane!] he whimpered.

"Bumblebee, get back!" Bulkhead yelled, worry for his small friend lacing his voice. Ratchet smacked him across the head, glaring at the wrecker.

Optimus didn't see the others, he was too concerned with the sobbing young mech in front of him. He wrapped his arms around Bumblebee protectively, petting the poor boy's door wings comfortingly. "I assure you I am not losing my sanity Bumblebee." the scout clung to him, very child-like.

[What's wrong with you then?] he whirled, letting himself relax into his leader's comforting embrace.

"What is indeed..." he murmured.

_Am I wasting my time_

_Tiptoeing around you?_

_Watching my words_

_Fall down at your feet_

_The truth is_

_Without you_

_I'm incomplete_

_And I dream that we're tied together_

_When I'm asleep_

_Wake up, you're gone_

_What went wrong?..._

_I hope you change your mind_

_If you want me back_

_I'm sleeping in the same sheets_

_Haven't changed a thing_

_Since you left me alone_

_Do you want me back?_

_Cos I can't stand the suspense_

_At my heart's expense..._

"-we need to be helping him, not accusing him of a degrading processor!" Ratchet snapped, once again hitting Bulkhead with his wrench. "So stop talking about things you don't understand and ask him what's wrong!"

Bumblebee shivered in his grasp, making Optimus feel even worse. His lack of self control was wearing on them all. The feelings and notions he was seeing around him made him-for an innumerable time that day- start to let tears escape his optics.

He wished he could show Arcee how much he needed her, just so he could help the others around him. They all needed her. She was the glue that helped everyone stay together, the one to remind them that things had been worse, and to make them realize that better times could be coming.

_I hope you're happy_

_Now that I'm sad..._

"I'm sorry Bumblebee." he whispered to the mech that was the closest thing he had ever had to a son. "I promise, I will make things right..." Ratchet and Bulkhead started yelling again, making the scout tremble in fear.

"Arcee, I've never needed you more then now." he clenched his optics shut. "I need you to come back to us."

_I hope you change your mind_

_If you want me back_

_I'm sleeping in the same sheets_

_Haven't changed a thing_

_Since you left me alone_

_Do you want me back?_

_Cos I can't stand the suspense_

_At my heart's expense.._.

Optimus opened his optics, a new fire behind them that made Bumblebee jump in surprise. He let go of the scout and stood up to his full hight. "Ratchet, Bulkhead, that is enough out of both of you!" he looked at them sternly. "Bulkhead and Bumblebee, pick the children up from school. Ratchet, prepare the ground-bridge."

The Autobots looked up in shock at the new determined look in their leader's optics. He strode past them to stand in front of their bridge, his stance filled with renewed confidence. He was going to go find Arcee. He had to. For the team...

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**So with this chapter I was trying to say that the Autobots can't function without Arcee. Please Review, I only have a few chapters left to write and reviews keep me going. :)**


	6. I need you

**I do not own the Lyrics to "I need you".**

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Arcee grasped her makeshift spear tightly in both hands as she looked around the forest clearing. A large empty circle surrounded by half dead, crooked looking, bare trees. That was where she was taking her stand.

The sky was black and in the distance she could see the the bright orange glow of the fire she had accidentally caused. The smoke was rising far up into the air, and she knew she didn't have long before the human fire fighters showed up.

"Come on Airachnid!" her voice cracked with grief, and tears streamed down her face. "I know you're out there... Come On!" she screamed, tired of feeling hunted.

She jumped up onto the large rock in the center of the clearing, looking around desperately to find her enemy. After a long two months of tracking and nearly off-lining three times in the last two weeks, she had had just about enough of that glitch's games.

For a moment, all was silent. Even the wind stopped blowing. It was in that moment that she thought of her fellow Autobots. Would they ever know what happened to her if she died?

_I don't need a lot of things_

_I can get by with nothing_

_Of all the blessings life can bring_

_I've always needed something.._.

Closing her optics for a moment, she took a steadying breath. Before she died she just had to hear from them one last time. She opened her com-link and connected with the Autobot base.

"Arcee to base..." her voice came out as a whisper, and she was surprise that her sensors could even pick up the sound. She waited, wanting ever so badly to hear some sort of reply. She vented when there was no reply. "If anyone get's this, I'm probably dead." She waited again, praying that someone would say something! But after a minute was passed, she closed the link.

"Such beautiful parting words Arcee." Airachnid wiped away fake tears from her optics. "I think my spark is going to die of sappy partings."

Arcee stared at the black spider con. Twirling her spear in a circle she prepared herself. "This ends here con!" she couldn't help but feel slightly abandoned by the Autobots, and perhaps that was why the first blow took her by surprise. She flew backwards, falling down the small slope.

She groaned weakly as she picked herself up. With a pain in her spark, she realized that when she fell there had always been someone to help her. Optimus wasn't there to protect her this time. If she was going to avenge Tailgate, she needed to be more careful.

_But I've got all I want_

_When it comes to loving you_

_You're my only reason_

_You're my only truth_...

Arcee quickly dodged the next blows, but Airachnid seemed to be in much better shape than she was. Her fangs dripped with fresh poisoned Energon, and her actions were quick and fluent. With dread, Arcee realized that there was no way she could beat her. She was wounded, tired, sick, and dying slowly. If there was any time she needed the Autobot's help, it was now.

_I need you like water_

_Like breath, like rain_

_I need you like mercy_

_From heaven's gate_

_There's a freedom in your arms_

_That carries me through_

_I need you_...

She choked when Airachnid picked her up in her spider claws, holding her above the ground. She wished she could scream, kick, punch, anything! But she hung there limp like a human 'rag doll'.

"Well, Arcee I'm disappointed. Even Tailgate put up more of a fight." she sneered into her audios with a smirk.

Arcee shut her optics tightly. "Just scrap me already, I don't care anymore." she breathed, feeling an immense amount of pain grip her as she was turned up side down. She didn't have the will to keep fighting. Optimus had been her reason to keep fighting all those years.

_You're the hope that moves me_

_To courage again_

_You're the love that rescues me_

_When the cold winds, rage..._

Her indifference confused Airachnid, but she merely smiled with bared fangs. "Oh, I will... All in good time my dear Arcee." She brought the weak bot closer to her face and bit violently into her neck. She screamed in agony as the poison was injected into her veins. "First I want to have some fun."

_And it's so amazing_

_'Cause that's just how you are_

_And I can't turn back now_

_'Cause you've brought me too far_...

Darkness started to claim her, like the angel of death creeping in to claim her spark. Pain riddled her processor, yet she knew she would not die. The pain wasn't bad enough. Airachnid would torture her until she couldn't feel pain anymore, then she would be left for scrap, to die alone.

_I need you like water_

_Like breath, like rain_

_I need you like mercy_

_From heaven's gate_

_There's a freedom in your arms_

_That carries me through_

_I need you_

_Oh yes I do..._

"Optimus..."

_I need you_

_I need you_...

The poison rendered her unconscious.

* * *

**Thank you all for your support! I didn't think this story would be liked so much. And thank-you for the song suggestions, I have all the songs I need to finish this story. :) you guys are awesome! :)**


	7. Untitled

**Although this is supposed to be a song fic, this chapter does not have a song. For some reason I couldn't find a song that fit it very well. If you would like to suggest a song for it I might come back and edit one into it later. Oh, and there's a lot of switching between Optimus and Arcee in this chapter too. Anyways, enjoy.**

* * *

Hearing the message a second time, Optimus felt his spark sink. The first words he had heard her utter in two months were the last thing he wanted to ever hear. He bit down hard on his lip, forcing himself to keep his rage and sorrow in check. "Ratchet, can you determine Arcee's position?" he asked quickly, pleading to Primus that the answer was yes.

Ratchet pulled up a few things and cross checked the message for a location. "It's hard..." he looked at the screen intently, "But not for me. She is somewhere in the northern section of New York it seems. Give me a second and I will have the exact location of the transmission."

Optimus breathed out in relief, hope filling his spark where despair had lingered for so long. He could find her and bring her back home. But her message had him worried. Why would she be dead?

The moment the ground-bridge flared to life. He didn't care what she had said. He was going to bring her back, and she was going to be alive. She had to be. He called Bumblebee and Bulkhead to him and together they were transported away.

* * *

Upon entering the frozen land, Optimus brought out his Ion cannons and surveyed the area. As far as he could tell there was no life of any kind in sight. He 'hmmed' thoughtfully to himself, perhaps Ratchet had the wrong coordinates?

He took an Energon tracer from his sub-space and scanned the area. It showed nothing at first, but after a few taps it started to pick up a signal. Two signals.

"No..." he looked down at the rock near his feet, his tanks turning upside down when he saw the spilled Energon mixed with a sickly green substance. "Airachnid."

* * *

Arcee groaned, feeling her Energon pound in her processor. She on-lined her optics slowly, pain riddling her systems. She was in a dark cave, strung up by her feet with web. How typical.

She twisted uncomfortably, trying to get a better look around her. She saw the faint glow of Energon around a corner and heard the trickling of a stream running through the under ground tunnels. But there was no sign of Airachnid.

"Hello?" she called out into the darkness, wondering if the con had just left her there to slowly starve of Energon depletion. It would be like her to do something like that, holding her a few yards away from the one thing that would keep her alive.

Her calls bounced around the walls, making her helm ache until the sound stopped. She vented gravely and tried to move her arms to cut the web, but it was too strenuous for her to do in her weakened state. "Is anybody out there?" when still there came no reply she closed her optics and forced herself to turn on her locating beacon. If anyone saw it she would be lucky, the Energon was probably masking her signature. "Rust in pit Airachnid." she cursed. "And Optimus, you can do the same." she felt abandonment taking over her spark. He probably didn't even care that she was gone and alone.

* * *

Optimus slid down the rocky slope quickly, ignoring the scratches on his body and the mini rockslide he caused. He had sent Bumblebee and Bulkhead off in a different direction, and had split from them to widen their search. If Airachnid had found Arcee, they didn't have time to lose.

The ice covered rocks made him slip painfully, landing on his servos and knees on the valley floor. He groaned quietly, picking himself up. But then he froze, his optics widening in hope. An Energon deposit lay in front of him, webs covering the entrance to a small cave. That Primus forsaken spider femme must have been in there. And if he was, it stood to reason that Arcee probably was too.

He quickly tore away the webbing, crawling into the hole cautiously. "Hold on Arcee, I'm coming for you."

* * *

It wasn't long before she heard the quiet clinks of Airachnid's spider legs on the roof above her. Arcee looked up slightly, but then just hung there limp. Her nemesis smirked and jumped to the floor so that they were optic to optic.

"Well, well, well. Sleeping Beauty is finally awake." she smiled, caressing her face with a venomous claw, burning marks into her. "You must really be low on Energon for that little amount of poison to affect you so long." Her voice was high and casual, as if she was talking about the weather. "So, Arcee, where are all your little friends? They must be so worried about you, considering how long you've been away from them." she spat some poison on a chunk of Energon that she held and rolled it between her servos absentmindedly.

Arcee didn't respond, merely looking away from her captor so she wouldn't see that she was about to cry. But Airachnid had a sharp sense of sight.

"Why Arcee, did they abandon you?" she tsked sympathetically. "How tragic... I never thought Optimus to be so, well, deceptive." her smirk widened when a tear escaped her prisoner's optic. "He tricked you into thinking he cared about you, and then he just lets you leave and doesn't even bother to make sure you're okay? What a jerk-aft. Even Megatron tries to track you down if you leave..."

Arcee glared at her, spitting in her face. "Don't you dare compare him to Megatron you glitch!" she fumed. Airachnid paused in her mauling of her Energon crystal to to wipe the liquid away from her face.

"Loyal to the end I suppose?" she said indifferently, examining her Energon, it was a sickly mucky color with barely any or it's original glow left. She chuckle lightly and nibbled on a corner, making venom foam at the corners of her lips. "Would you like some Arcee, you know I am a generous hostess. No? Are you sure?" she licked he fingers after it had been diminished.

"So, here's the thing." she leaned against the wall, crossing her arms. "I need to send a message to both Megatron and Optimus. I want to be left alone. So, to make my point I'm going to kill you and Starscream. Simple really."

"You're sick Airachnid..."

"It's all in the way you look at it darling." she cooed, stepping towards her bearing her fangs. "Now for some of that fun I talked about..."

* * *

Optimus heard an agonizing scream and quickened his pace. His steps echoed loudly around him, but he could care less. Arcee was in pain, and he had to stop it.

"Please!" her screams penetrated deep into his spark, making him keep running faster. "Please stop!" she screamed again, her voice laden with excruciating pain.

"Arcee!" he called out to her, hoping that over whatever she was feeling she could hear him and know that he was close by. "Arcee, I'm coming!" he pushed past webs and Energon, refusing to slow until he had found her and taken her away somewhere safe.

He saw a bright glow of green and turned to see a pool of venom on the floor, circling a small figure bound by web. Arcee lay still, her optics leaking a substance that was no longer it's pure blue.

He rushed to her side, scanning the room for Airachnid, but it seemed that the wretched spider femme was long gone. He cut away the web that encased her carefully and scooped Arcee up into his arms, holding her against his chest. She whimpered in pain and he could see fang marks on her neck and shoulder, and long scratches down her face. She had been severely poisoned.

"Arcee." he whispered her name in her audios, resting his helm against hers. "Arcee, it's alright. I'm here..." he stroked her frame softly, caressing her scarred cheek as he made his way back out of the cave. "I'm here Arcee..."

She gasped in pain, not even looking up to meet his gaze. "Where were you when I needed you?" her words made him catch his breath, but he didn't stop to explain. He didn't have time to tell her everything. She needed to get to Ratchet before she off-lined permenantly.

"I'm so sorry Arcee."

* * *

**So, will she make it? Or will the poison be too much and take her away forever? Leave a review and come back in a few days (or weeks, depending on my writing priorities) and find out what happens next. Thank-you for reading. :)**


	8. Things left Unsaid

**I do not own the Lyrics to "Things left Unsaid"**

* * *

"I've done all I can do Optimus." Ratchet's deadpan voice broke the silence that enveloped the two of them. "It's up to Primus what happens to her now." the medic backed away from the operating table, wiping venom tainted Energon away from his servos with a large towel.

Optimus stood up slowly and clasped his friend's shoulder solemnly. "Go get some rest old friend. I will watch over her throughout the night." he assured him, knowing that deep down the medic didn't want to leave at all. They all ha seen so many friends and companions die throughout the war...

The old mech vented slowly, glancing between Optimus and Arcee hesitantly. "I know you are the best one to watch over her right now. She needs you right now more then I think she needs me..." he turned away slowly, pausing as he reached the corner. "But if she so much as twitches-"

"You'll be the first to know." Optimus nodded in understanding. "Rest well." the medic nodded in return and left him alone with their injured friend.

Optimus looked back at Arcee's still faceplates, his spark clenching tightly. For a minute he just stood there watching her breathe in and out. She had several tools hooked up to her to help her with the simplest of functions, and there was a steady beeping sound showing her spark pulse.

He vented slowly and shakily, pulling a crate next to the berth. He sat down next to her, his processor racing, wishing he could say so much. But he knew she couldn't hear him.

_It's just a matter of time a few days ago_

_I saw you, you were fine_

_Remembering what you said_

_About the book you read_

_The one I got you_

_The Beginning of the End.._.

He leaned forward, propping his elbows on his knee joints tiredly. he hadn't recharged well since she had left, and now coupled with grief he started to feel the strain it was putting on his body. But he couldn't care less. His entire focus was set on the femme in front of him. She looked ghostly. So sick. Weakened.

He clenched his optics shut tightly. He never wanted to see her like this. Struggling for life. He didn't know if she was even still fighting for it. Did she even want to live?

_Oh how we'd talk_

_For hours upon end_

_What I would give_

_Just to do it again_

_But you're lying there_

_In this hospital bed_

_Won't you open you eyes_

_And let's talk once again.._.

He looked back at her, his optics bleary with Energon. She just couldn't give up, not now. Not after all the time he had spent trying to find her and bring her back. He had so much he had to say! So much he had to tell her...

_If you fly away tonight_

_I want to tell you that I love you_

_I hope that you can hear me_

_I hope that you can feel me_

_If you fly away tonight_

_I want to tell you that I'm sorry_

_That I never told you_

_When we were face to face..._

Optimus reached out to her, stroking his fingers down her arm to her servo, grasping it in his own softly. "Arcee?" he watched her carefully, trying to find any sign that she could hear him, but she was unresponsive. "Arcee, I am so sorry." he bowed his helm, feeling his tears drip to the cold floor. Her servo was cold. Like ice.

He shook his helm, letting himself cry. No title of Prime was going to stop him from mourning the one he loved. There was little hope for her survival, and he knew it. "Please, Primus don't take her away from me. Please... I cannot go on without her. She is everything to me. You have taken my life, turned me into your weapon, and used me to fight this battle. I have no freedom to emotion. You have taken everything that I used to be away from me. Will you take her away as well?" he cursed, his spark was breaking. He was sure there was a hairline fracture across it now. He couldn't take such emotional abuse, it was just too much. "When is it enough?"

He stroked his thumb over her small servo, bringing it up to his lips firmly. He kissed her delicate servo, begging her to awaken. The warmth seeped from his cheek into her as he held her palm against his face. "Come back to me Arcee..."

_Well I've been here all night_

_And I'm watching you_

_Breathe in and breathe out_

_Is it really you_

_Or just a machine_

_That's giving you life_

_And it's making seem_

_That there could be hope_

_I could say to your face_

_If it weren't for you_

_That there would be no grace_

_That's covered my life_

_You took the time_

_To speak into my mind_

_And my heart_

_Words of life..._

The minutes passed like hours and hours felt like an eternity. He found himself simply frozen in place, clutching her servo in his as if he could transmit his feelings to her through their touch. He had eventually opened his spark chamber slightly, bathing her in its azure light, all in hopes that she would feel his his never fading presence. But she didn't react at all if she did feel his spark reaching out to her.

"I hope you can forgive me." his voice cracked from lack of use and built up grief from the last few hours. He moved off the crate to kneel down on the floor beside her, resting his helm against her servo. "Will you ever let me make it up to you? Is there any way I can convince you to come back to me? My sweet, sweet Arcee..." His spark throbbed sadly, and the light flickered over her face.

_If you fly away tonight_

_I want to tell you that I love you_

_I hope that you can hear me_

_I hope that you can feel me_

_If you fly away tonight_

_I want to tell you that I'm sorry_

_That I never told you_

_When we were face to face..._

Optimus bent down over her, caressing her face softly. "I love you Arcee." his tears spilled into her off-lined optics and he pressed his lips against hers. It was soft, and he made sure it was brief. "Come back to me..." he whispered in her audios, resting his helm against hers lightly, watching her optics closely.

_So goodbye for now_

_And I'll see you again_

_Some way, somehow_

_When it's my turn_

_To go to the other side_

_I'll hold you again_

_And melt at your smile.._.

Her fingers twitched in his servo.

He jerked upright, his spark fluttering in excitement. "Arcee?" he straightened up, watching her twitch intently. But she didn't move.

_Now all I have_

_Are the ones that I'm with_

_And you taught me not_

_To take for granted_

_The time that we have_

_To show that we care_

_Speak into their minds_

_And their hearts_

_While their here_

_And say I love you..._

"Arcee?" for a moment he thought that he had merely imagined it, but the flickering in her optics told him otherwise. The machine keeping track of her spark started to sound more quickly.

Being careful not to hurt her, Optimus scooped her up into the crook of his elbow. He stroked her helm softly, holding her close. Willing her to open her optics he leaned over her again to whisper to her. "I love you... I _Love_ You. And I will _never_ deny it again." he pecked her cheek gently.

_If you fly away tonight_

_I want to tell you that I love you_

_I hope that you can hear me_

_I hope that you can feel me_

_If you fly away tonight_

_I want to tell you that I'm sorry_

_That I never told you_

_When we were face to face.._.

"Don't leave me now sweetspark."

* * *

**She's waking up. Will she live? Will she die? Will Optimus remember to tell Ratchet? Please Review! :**)


	9. Forever

**I do not own the lyrics to "Forever". And to the wonderful readers who suggested songs, I'm sorry I couldn't use most of them. They were all really good ideas. But this is the last chapter, so without further wait-**

* * *

The moment Optimus felt her gasp and saw her optics flutter open he let tears of joy roll down his face. "Arcee-" she looked around slowly in confusion, her gaze pausing on him uncertainly. "Cee?" he caressed her face lightly, lovingly.

"Optimus?"

Her voice was nothing but a faint whisper, but he heard it. And he was overjoyed. "You're alive-You're okay!" he scooped her up in his arms, holding her tightly against his open chest, relief spreading through him as her fingers grasped at his frame. She was going to be okay. "Arcee, I am so sorry! I should never have let you go-please forgive me!" he begged, his tears spilling down on her as he buried his face in her shoulder. "I was such a fool, such an aft! I should never have left you, I should have told you the truth to begin with..."

"The truth?"

He looked up at her, his frame trembling with mixed emotions. Then, he captured her lips for a long heated kiss. When he pulled away they both were breathing heavily and his spark felt ready to burst! "I love you. I always have. Always will."

She looked at him, dazed. "Always?" she sounded like she wanted with all her soul for it to be the truth, but was unsure. She also felt feeble and weak.

_Sometimes I feel so cold_

_Like I'm waiting around all by myself_

_Loneliness gets so old_

_I'm in the lost and found, sitting on the shelf.._.

He held her securely against his chest, and shuddered as her fingers brushed over his spark chamber. "Yes, always..."

Arcee looked up at him for a moment, her silence and blank expression scaring him. Then, before he could stop her, she pulled her life support lines from her spark chamber and threw her arms around him. He heard her sob next to his audios and he hugged her closer to him. "You're lying..." she cried, and he could feel her tears streaming onto his shoulder. "You have to be lying..."

_Been stuck for way too long_

_(I hear Your voice)_

_You're who I'm counting on.._.

"I'm not lying to you." he pressed his lips to her neck cables, purring to her quietly. "I love you. If you doubt me, look into my spark. Search me, sift through my soul. You'll find I have nothing to lie about." he gasped in surprise as her servo stroked his glowing spark. But after a few strokes, she stopped.

She pulled away slightly, holding his face between her servos. "I don't need to look." her thumb lightly caressed his cheek, and she smiled weakly.

_Oh, tell me You're here_

_That You will watch over me forever_

_Oh, take hold of my heart_

_Show me You'll love me forever, forever.._.

"If you say you love me, I want to trust you." Arcee grabbed his ear finials mercilessly, pulling him down to be level with her. "But I still want you to prove it."

He moaned breathily, his optics flickering with pleasure when she didn't let go of his antennae. "I'll do anything-" She pulled him closer, pecking his bottom lip and he shut up, letting himself indulge in her soft kisses.

_I know that You can tell_

_When I start to let my hope fade away_

_I need to catch myself_

_Open my ears to hear You calling my name_...

Optimus reached up to the base of her neck, massaging the cables there gently as he pulled her into a fuller, more passionate kiss. "How do you feel? Any pain? Dizziness?" he pecked her between words, trailing his lips up her pink armor highlights.

"No, I'm fine..."

He smiled. "Good." he lay her down on the berth gently and resumed their kiss. "You should know I can't show my feeling around the others-"

"I don't care if we can't be open with the others about it Orion... Just knowing that you really do care is enough for me." she smiled up at him, calmly caressing his cheek.

_Been fighting way too long_

_(I hear Your voice)_

_You had me all along.._.

Orion Pax bent down over her and kissed her softly, letting his glossa push past her lips to taste her. He smiled happily and off-lined his optics as she fingered his antennae again. "I want to do more then just care Arcee..." he moved onto the berth, overshadowing her. Laying down next to her, he pulled her against him and kissed her again. "I need to love you, make sure you are never lonely again. I need to bond with you."

_Oh, tell me You're here_

_That You will watch over me forever_

_Oh, take hold of my heart_

_Show me You'll love me forever..._

_When I'm starting to drown_

_You jump in to save me_

_When my world's upside down_

_Your hands they shake me and wake me..._

Arcee looked up at him, shocked awe in her optics. He bowed his head slightly, feeling embarrassment washing over him. He hadn't meant to say that. "N-not right away! I mean, I don't want to pressure you into anything..." he was stopped when she touched his chest intently. "Arcee?"

"Ask me." she purred quietly. He started to question her meaning but she covered his lips with a finger, looking into his optics. "Just ask me."

_Oh, tell me You're here_

_That You will watch over me forever_

_Oh, take hold of my heart_

_Show me You'll love me forever..._

He looked at her for a brief moment, then threw caution and reason to the wind. "Arcee, you are the most wonderful thing that has ever happened or ever will happen to me. I love you more than anything in the universe. Will you be my Sparkmate?"

Her smile brightened even more and she had tears of happiness in her optics. "Yes!" She kissed him readily and opened her spark chamber slightly.

Orion moved back in shock, covering his open chest. "Wait, now?-" he was pulled back to her, and after the beautiful feeling of her spark's energy washed over him he needed no further convincing...

_Oh, tell me You're here_

_That You will watch over me forever_

_Oh, take hold of my heart_

_Show me You'll love me forever, forever.._.

Later, in the privacy of his quarters, Orion cuddled with his Sparkmate. He sleepily stroked her back and she fingered the door to his spark. Both were finally happy, with each other and safe...

"I love you." he whispered, pecking her helm lightly. She murmured something incoherently back and snuggled closer to him. He merely smiled and shut his optics, ready for some much needed recharge.

* * *

**The End.**

**He can't love Arcee as a Prime, but as Orion Pax he can be anything she needs him to be. :) I might do a very small chapter/epilogue if I get any interest back from you guys, so leave a review please! :)**


	10. Chapter 10

**This chapter will not have a song. Thank you all for the support and for reading this short little story. :)**

* * *

Bumblebee turned over in his berth, feeling restless. He wanted to know if Arcee was going to be okay, but Ratchet had sent him away before he could even see her. She was like a sister, or even a mother sometimes. He wanted to make sure she was alright.

He beeped sadly, drawing out the sound as he looked at his berthroom door. He checked his internal clock, and finally stood up, wandering outside into the hall and down to the med bay.

The base was still quiet, and most of the hallways were very dark. Bumblebee's optics whipped back and forth nervously as he walked. He noticed that Optimus had been particularly distressed about Arcee's condition. And if he was there with her still, he didn't want to disturb him. So he silently peaked around the corner into the med-bay.

It was empty.

His spark hammered in his chest, and he whirred in panic. Where was Arcee?!

Bumblebee, sent a message to Ratchet in alarm and started back down the hall he had come to find the medic. What if Arcee had run off again? She was hurt, what if she got hurt even more? He beeped worriedly to himself as he passed the door to their leader's berthroom, but then he stopped. Taking a few steps backwards he peaked into the slightly open doorway, becoming confused.

Optimus Prime lay on his side on the berth, his arms wrapped protectively around the smaller figure of Arcee. His spark was opened up to her and her servo stroked it as their lips locked passionately. They both remained unaware of the young Scout as he watched, frozen in place.

Optimus and Arcee? Together in his room? He couldn't wrap his processor around it. What were they doing?

Soon he felt Ratchet's presence beside him. The medic looked worried at first, but seeing that Bumblebee was no longer afraid he calmed. He grasped the boy's shoulder firmly, and guided him away from the open doorway.

[Ratchet... What was that?] he couldn't help but ask. Being too young to know what a Sparkmate meant, or in any case what a spark merge was, he had no clue that what he had just witnessed was Optimus Prime bonding with Arcee.

Ratchet gave a tired sigh, guiding the young scout back to his own quarters. "I'll tell you about it when you're older Bee. Right now you need to get some sleep." he motioned the bit back into his room and left him there to stare at the ceiling in wonder.

* * *

Ratchet smirked to himself as he returned to his room quietly. "It's about time!" he laughed softly and returned to his own recharge, feeling that everything was as it should be...

* * *

**The End :)**


End file.
